the username is aspirational

She/her, early 30s, unloveable, ugly, fat, in need of hard discipline. Into orgasm denial, food restriction, suicide encouragement, bullying, dumbification, brainwashing, manipulation, and humiliation. Not interested in any blackmail/training arrangements right now but feel free to message me with motivation and/or abusive words to keep me up at night. :)
CW: 146 lbs LW: ~100 lbs GW: 88 lbs.

Can I tell you guys something dumb happening in my personal life? Maybe one of you will get off on how disgustingly mentally ill I am, lol.

My beautiful, amazing friend (who I'm slightly in love with) and her husband want me to sleep with them, lol. They're both in good shape (especially her husband whose main hobby is fucking Taekwondo of all things...). I think they're just desperate to have a threesome and they know I'm easy and a safe bet. Anyway, it's just funny because if I took my clothes off at least one of them would literally vomit, like... 😂. I don't know what they're thinking.

Anyway I just want to reiterate that I'm so unfuckable right now that even when an opportunity drops itself into my lap I feel obligated to be like WHOA THERE and protect them from themselves lol.

But also, I know it would really fuck my brain up in a not-good way if I slept with someone I like but can't actually be with. The destructive part of me says I should do it anyway but I am going to put my foot down since that ACTUALLY might make me unalive, lol.

Anyway. Where's my award for valor and bravery 😤